Auzins Returns to Haunt Bison

Bison 2 Peterborough Phantoms 3

11/12/13

Last night at Planet Ice Bison welcomed the Peterborough Phantoms for a tight titanic table topping tussle. At the final buzzer it was the Phantoms who emerged the winners in a robust, physical and highly competitive game, which saw them outplayed and outshot for long periods, but emerge winners which enabled them to leapfrog Bison to the top of the EPL. In the final analysis their outstanding goaltender Janis Auzins effectively won it for them. Their luck was in complete contrast to last Sunday’s game when they outshot the Swindon Wildcats by 47-14, but still needed up losing the game by 1-0. Perhaps last night, therefore, they deserved a bit of luck.

The game started badly for the Phantoms. Within the first 20 seconds they had turned the puck over in their own defensive zone and then Marc Levers nervously hoisted the puck over the plexi. A loud sonorous blast emanated from the referee’s whistle. “You can’t do that, old chap. That’s delay of the game,” he said. “You must face the consequences of your actions and serve a custodial sentence”. Within a minute of the power play Bison had scored. The Phantoms were simply outnumbered, outplayed and outdone as the puck moved from Lumberjack Joe Rand to Ryan “You What” Watt to René Jarolin, who swiped an airborne puck past Janis Auzins and into the ghostly net for 1-0 Bison.

Bison dominance continued and it would be 3 minutes before a Phantoms player entered the Bison defensive zone. However, a couple of power plays with penalties awarded to Bison on 3:53 and 7:13 gave them possession and confidence and the game became more evenly balanced and eventually resulted in a levelling score on 9 minutes. An attempted pass from one side of the back of the goal to the other hit the goal frame and went straight to Craig Scott who immediately passed out from behind the goal line where Martins Susters lurked in front of the net. Judging by his first name you might get confused that there were two players called Martin Susters. Had there been they might have got in each other's way. There weren’t and they didn’t. The solitary Susters fired in. 1-1.

The period concluded on a much more even keel than had looked likely after the opening exchanges. The 2^nd proved to be one of utter dominance from the home side with a shot count of 23-8. Despite this Bison could score but a solitary goal, the hero of the hour (actually 20 minures) being Auzins, who, not for the first time at Planet Ice, would go on to receive the Phantoms’ Top Banana award. That solitary goal came on 24:53. Lumberjack Joe Rand won a face off in the circle to the right of the Phantoms’ goal. Kurt “The Scissors” Reynolds picked up the ruck, skated to a central location and unleashed a wrist shot which Alan “Prairie Dog” Lack tipped in. 2-1 Bison. When the goal was scored the Irishman in Block C exclaimed "BEGORRAH!", the Australian in Block B "STRUTH!" and the men of Trio Ploskie in Block A exploded a few balloons.

In the 34^th/35^th minutes the Phantoms were presented with an opportunity to restore parity with successive penalties to a hooking Rabbits’ Foot Joe Baird and a slashing Declan “Barrack-O” Balmer, which resulted in the badly behaved Bison blueliners bowling box benchward for a custodial sentence of 2 minutes each. This meant that Bison had 1:40 to defend a 5 on 3. The defence of the Bison net proved more stalwart than the siege of Pondicherry (1778 if you’re interested) and the ghostly threat was snuffed out. No sooner than Bison had returned to a complete complement than Long Ciaron Long found himself in on goal. He moved forward in a rush, with rapidity and urgency, leaving aside all temptation to be apathetic or even pathetic. He fired in a shot but Auzins proved equal to it.

The period drew to a close with Bison enjoying a 2-1 lead – not much to show for a period of utter dominance and principally due to the heroics of Auzins. Was the homesters failure to convert dominance into goals going to come back and bite them posteriorly? Ever heard of Ernesto R. Guevara de la Serna? Probably not. From 1948-53 he was a medical student at Argentina’s University of Buenos Aires. He loved playing rugby and chess, reading poetry and motorcycle touring. That’s him on the left below. Within 3 years of qualifying as a doctor he had undergone an amazing metamorphosis into Cuban revolutionary guerrilla leader Che Guevara, whose face was to adorn a million T-shirts and just as many posters. That’s the same man on the right below. If the Phantoms wanted to win this game they also had to undergo an amazing metamorphosis from the team which had been so comprehensively outplayed in the 2^nd period. This they did and went on to win the game, as I shall relate, dear reader, albeit with heavy heart.

The dictionary defines hook as “a curved or angular piece of metal or other hard substance for catching, pulling, holding, or suspending something”. Could this include a hockey stick? Yes it could and, in Ref Matthews opinion, Cuddly Joe Greener used his stick as a hook to impede his opponent in the 48^th minute. The referee blew his whistle, signalled a hooking offense and said to Cuddly Joe, ”I’m throwing you in the can for that.” And into the can he went. 6 previous power play opportunities had failed to bear fruit for the Phantoms, but on this occasion they finally made it count. Lloyd Gibson fired a cross ice pass from the left wing to Ales Padelek who slipped the puck in at the back door. 2-2. Further assist to Craig Scott.

All Bison’s good work had been undone. They needed to snatch back the initiative and regain their advantage. But, despite the homesters’ redoubled efforts, it would be the Phantoms who would grab the go ahead goal thanks to a monumental and indeed cataclysmic error from Jon Baston in the Bison net. Before I describe what happened spare a thought for the young stand-in goaltender, who has been a revelation in allowing only a single goal in his previous 2 games for Bison at an insane save percentage of 0.98. In this game he pulled off a string of impressive saves, catches and blocks to deny the Phantoms. Had one of the shots he had no right to keep out gone in, we would have had the same score had he not committed the unfortunate blunder I am about to describe. Set up by Marc Levers, James Ferrara sent a bobbling but paceless shot towards the net. We heard a thud as Baston got a pad to it, but then, much to the very grave chagrin of the Bison backers, we saw the puck slide very slowly over the line, having passed through the hapless netman’s 5-hole. It was an Ooo Betty moment for the young goaltender, whose body language clearly showed he was more than just mildly aggrieved at the manner of the score. Never mind. These things happen to all goaltenders. A further assist was awarded to Matins Susters, who, as I have already reported, is only one person.

So Bison now trailed, but had enough time to bring the game back. Now was the time to throw the kitchen sink at the Phantoms’ goal, not literally thankfully. The next 7 and a half minutes saw more action in the Phantoms’ defensive zone than had been seen at the sieges of Badajoz (1812), Mafeking (1899) and Stalingrad (1943) all rolled into one.

On 55 minutes Cuddly Joe Greener was tripped and sent headlong into the boards by Edgars Bebris. It looked very nasty and the crowd bayed for blood. Ref Matthews astonished all when he meted out merely a 2 minute minor to the errant Latvian, who for 4 years was a Sheffield Steeldog and doubtless schooled in the art of Payette-esque foul play. 30 seconds later Balmer received a 2 + 10 for checking to the head. Bearing in mind the seemingly light punishment for the Grener/Bebris incident, the penalty to Balmer had the crowd on its collective feet. Particularly vocal was the Howling Man of Block C who turned cerise as he treated all around to one of his typically incomprehensible tirades. He must have been enunciating the views held by all the Bison backers by objecting to the disparity in punishment for the two crimes, as I saw no-one disagreeing with him. Alas I could catch no words except “You moron”.

 

In the ensuing 4 on 4 Bison thought they had levelled it. When Long Ciaron fired in a shot which was saved but not covered. There then ensued a situation in front of goal which could be described as a melée magnifique, a free-for-all fracas or a demonic donnybrook (a what? OK chaos then). As the players jostled, jabbed, jolted and joggled, the scene could be accurately described as “unholy” and not only because no vicars, rabbis or bishops were involved or at least that I noticed. Eventually the puck found its way across the line only for Auzins to scoop it back out. I couldn’t see that from where I was, but the Bespectacled Youth, a closer observer in Block B, was adamant that it was over and the sight of Bison players with arms aloft confirmed that they thought so also. But the referee hadn’t seen it clearly and no goal was the black and white striped declaration.

With 1:41 remaining Baston was pulled to enable a 6 on 5. Bison continued to lay siege on the Phantoms’ net, Badajoz/Mafeking/Stalingrad style, but to not avail. The ghostly visitors held on and at the final buzzer Bison had lost their first home ice game of the season after a run of 15 consecutive wins – 2 pre season and 13 regular season games. Despite the disappointment of the loss I am sure that all fans who witnessed this edge-of-seat spectacle appreciated a game which illustrated the combative, exciting, physical and skilful brand of hockey delivered in this league. All apart from the curmudgeonly glass half empty despondents who said they weren’t coming again. But the less said about them the better. Auzins was Phantoms’ MoM, as I have already mentioned, and Alan “Prairie Dog” Lack bagged up the Bison award.