Sunday, 7 February 2016

Fortune Favours the Phantoms



Bison 2 Peterborough Phantoms 3
6/2/16

Who was it who said that the dividing line between winning and losing was as thin as an After Eight mint? Probably me. Well that’s not correct. It’s thinner than that – maybe the width of a Rizla fag paper. And that’s what we saw last night. A top of the table clash between two very evenly match teams. It could have gone either way, but didn’t. It was the Phantoms who enjoyed the rub of the green (see footnote for anorakish factoid about the origins of this expression) and edged it to remain in the title race. Now the Phantoms are 4 points behind Bison with a game in hand it’s all to play for. And don’t rule out Milton Keynes.

P1 opened and Bison didn’t hang around. With only 29 seconds gone it was 1-0. Aaron “Billy” Connolly won a battle on the boards, took the puck around the back of the goal and squared it across the slot to Stuart “The Cat” Mogg. The Phantoms D had been caught and on a downer, down and out, down in the mouth and down and dirty with their guard down and their trousers down. It was as if Moggie had a highly contagious disease because none of the Phantoms D came near him. He took his time, picked his spot and fired in a wrist shot. In Block B the Basingstoke Bison Backers (Bombay branch) bellowed “Blistering biryanis” and the bellicose builders from Bromley-by-Bow bawled “Bleeding brick bats”. OK I admit it. I made them up. But I couldn’t resist the opportunity for a bit of alliteration. Oh yes and René Jarolin was awarded the second assist.

The period was played out with no further scoring, but with a number of opportunities for both teams. By the end Bison had outshot the Phantoms by 12-7 and looked well worth their 1-0 lead, but, as we know, a prince can be transformed into an ugly frog in the blink of an eye and similarly a lead of 1-0 or 2-0 or sometimes even 3-0 in hockey can be lost in a similar measure of time. And so it proved in P2, as I shall relate, dear reader.

The Phantoms took only 1:29 of the 2nd to level it. From the goaltender’s left, Lloyd Gibson fired in a shot which was brilliantly saved by Jon “Shut-em-out” Baston in the Bison goal. Alas the puck flew wide to his right into the path of Deadly Darius Pliskauskas, who proved as sharp as the sharpest of sharp dressers in his sharpest sharp suit. He backhanded past a prone Baston and it was 1-1.

As I have already mentioned, Bison had outshot the Phantoms by 12-7 in the 1st, but all that counted for nothing. It said 1-1 on the scoreboard. Bison needed to snatch back the initiative. This they did in the 25 minute. On 24:41 James Ferrara was adjudged guilty of interference. As a result he had his collar felt and was sent down the steps and up the river to be thrown in the can to do a stretch of porridge without remission in the cooler behind bars. Bison had to make the power play count. This they did. With just over a minute of the power play played they powered back into the lead. Cuddly Joe Greener set up René Jarolin. His shot from the goaltender’s left was tipped in by Bison skipper Aaron “Billy” Connolly. It was a classic redirect. The puck slid agonisingly over the line, well agonising only if you were a Phantoms’ fan. On came the goal light and out came the referee’s flat pointy hand indicating a goal. The goal caused the Bison crowd to erupt Krakatoa style. The aristocrat in Block A shouted “Top drawer! A capital goal! Wacko-the diddle-o! What?” OK he doesn't exist either. Who cares? It was 2-1 Bison.

On 35 minutes the Phantoms restored parity to the score. The goal could be described as bizarre, weird, freakish and outlandish. I am not sure exactly how it went in but I did see the puck bouncing in the crease and sneaking over the line rather slowly with a jostling scrum of players in attendance in front of goal. It was a classic rub of the green goal. The scorer was an unassisted Will Weldon whose helmet came off in the melée.  Had he touched the puck after the loss of his lid? If so then the goal should be disallowed for “improper equipment” or had the head and helmet separated after. The Bison backers clung to the gossamer thread of hope, but alas it was a mere straw they were clutching at. The stripily attired official who is  referee Cloutman declared it to be a black and white issue. Goal allowed. 2-2. The Phantoms faithful threw their hats in the air. The Bison backers threw their hats to the floor. Weldon put his hat back on his head.

So into P3 we passed and all to play for. From the Phantoms’ perspective a regulation time win would suit them down to the ground as it would bring them within 4 points of Bison in the table with a game in hand, but even an overtime win would be gratefully received I am sure. For Bison a win would maybe not bang the final nail in the coffin of the Phantoms’ challenge, but it would certainly have had a funereal impact on their quest for the title. Who would be calling the undertaker with the final 20 minutes played out? It proved not to be the ghostly visitors.

After a fairly frantic P2 with 13 Bison and 11 Phantom shots on goal, the mood of the final period was seen to change quite significantly with neither side wishing to lose the game, especially are tiredness set in. There were half the number of shots on goal compared to the previous period and the atmosphere became increasingly edgy. Bison presented the Phantoms with their best chance of winning the game to date with slack defending in the 55th minute when Deadly Darius broke forward unchallenged over the blue line. The spectre of Pliskauskas was away. He had passed through the Bison D as easily as an apparition would pass through a brick wall. The Bison D were more likely to catch a cold than catch the revenant Phantom. But the wraith which is Jon Baston signalled the death knell of the ghostly Lithuanian’s scoring attempt as he blocked the shot and 2-2 it remained.

Was that the Phantoms’ best chance of winning wasted? As it proved no because they snatched the lead only a minute later on the power play with Declan “Barrack-O” Balmer banged up for slashing. The aforementioned lethal Lithuanian Deadly Darius slewed a cross ice pass to Tom Norton who was in on goal at the back door without a challenge. Let’s mix our metaphors and say the Bison D were up a gum tree without a paddle, although what use a paddle could be to someone stranded up a gum tree I cannot say. Baston stood up to face the challenge as he had done so effectively against Pliskauskas a minute before. Let’s not forget that an early butterfly leaves the top of the net wide open, but goalies always risk being beaten 5-hole. And that’s what happened. Norton went 5-hole and it was 3-2 Phantoms.

The naysayers, the ne’er-do-wells and even the nincompoops in the Bison crowd (some may have qualified as all three) thought it was game over. But it wasn’t. Bison had a great chance when Greener robbed possession and broke free. His slap shot was saved, but rebounded straight to Jarolin whose shot missed the target. In a final hurrah Coach Sheppard pulled Baston for the last minute of play, but the best chance during this period fell to the Phantoms. Craig Scott’s empty net attempt was blocked on the line by Long Ciaron Long, an incident which had all shouting “Great scott!” But that was it. The final buzzer sounder and it was rub of the green and 2 points to the Phantoms. Stuart “The Cat” Mogg and Tom Norton were voted Top Bananas for their respective teams.

Footnote : We all know what rub of the green means, but where did the expression originate? Scholars reckon it was from the game of bowls, which is of course played on a green, with a rub being defined as “inequality of the ground which hinders the motion of the bowl”. Golfers may claim it to be their own expression. In The Rules of Golf (1812 edition) it states “Whatever happens to a Ball by accident, must be reckoned a Rub of the green”. But bowls is a more ancient game, dating to Roman Times they believe. The oldest bowling green in the world in on our doorstep in Southampton – the “Old Bowling Green” first used in 1299. Now you know.

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